Day 337 - Sunday

I must admit I have very little difficulty in sharing my mistakes with people; however the opportunity does not present itself often.  Tonight was a different story.  Before church even started tonight my friend and I were in the prayer room together.  After everyone else had left something strange happened.  Well, not really all that strange... after all we are talking about God here!

I was sitting next to her and I put my hand on her and she began to cry.  After some time I asked her what was going on and she shared some vague things.  This prompted me to open up and share what the Lord and I had been talking about earlier in the day.

Over the last 6 years of my Christian walk, I have worked very hard to get rid of everything in my life that would be displeasing to God.  Unfortunately, no matter how hard I try, no matter how hard I fight... there are a couple areas in my life that I have just been unable to have complete breakthrough from.  I hate the behavior the way God says we are to hate sin.  I will do really well for a few months and then I will have a slip.  Now get your minds out of whatever you are thinking this great sin is... it really doesn't matter what it is... sin is sin is sin is sin.  There are no little sins or big sins... it is all the same to God.  And anyone who has read this over the last 11 months can probably figure out what mine is anyway! LOL

The point is... after my latest little slip up the last couple of days, I was asking God why I couldn't seem to get free from this.  His response to me surprised me:  If you could get free of this on your own or by following some formula, what need would you have of Me?  You would begin to think the miracles and signs were because you were so good or perfect and had gotten rid of sin in your life instead of recognizing that they are Mine.

Well that hit me like a ton of bricks.  To be honest I am still trying to get my theology around that one!  The upside of this little revelation ... it was also exactly what my friend needed to hear.  It was good for both of us because we also recognized that we aren't alone.  We are all still sinners, continually falling short of the glory of God.  I wish I could say this story is going to end with my walking in the fullness of all that God has for me, a sinless life, perfect in every way.  Unfortunately, that isn't how it works.  We are sinners in need of a saving God, saved by grace through faith, by a God who renews His mercy for me everyday!

So if anyone else is out there thinking that they aren't good enough to do God's work or that they have already messed it up by their behavior... Good... Now God can work in your life and through your life without YOU getting the credit!